Importance

In the everlasting search of happiness, I have came to a small conclusion, or at least the beginning of one. For one; I need to stop lying to myself. I do this far too often, and I have realized this very much in the recent past. Second; I need to stop analyzing ever fucking thing, good or bad, I need to take things for what they are and be HAPPY! Writing a blog that I feel the need to keep up on does NOT help me to stop analyzing things, but it definitely helps to organize my thoughts.
---
In other news, the feeling, the one I talk about all the time. Yeah, about that... it is DEAD. Gone, deceased, burried, hidden. It does not exist anymore and I don't think I'm able to get it back this time. Rough patches happen, yes, but this seems permanent. I do believe this is a mutual thing, but there is the lack of a second step. I don't know where to go from here, and am not sure if there is a right or wrong direction in which to travel. The entire situation is causing me much unwanted stress and wasted time justing thinking and writing about this.
---
The most important thing in my life right now is friendship. It's the only thing that seems to not cause me stress, and actually rids of some of it. My friends are keeping me going day to day and preventing me from completely EXPLODING which I would absolutely LOVE to do.